Ugh, it's the second week of school, and I am already feeling weary of my seemingly never-ending list of things to do. If you notice, my blogs are looooooooooooong during the hols and short during the school term. Not only because I have no time to type down my thoughts, but even more so because I have no time to even think or reflect on the rather non-existent happenings of my days. Urgh.
I read my students' blogs; the 03 batch are constantly writing about purposelessness, new experiences in their temp jobs, their army stories - whereas the 04 batch ruminate on how busy they are, how school sucks and how they feel tired and defeated. Guess who I identify with.. and no prizes for guessing which group I would far rather belong to. I want to be a student again! To be at the beginning of my adulthood, where each new day might be the beginning of a new phase of life. Not going on *shudder* twenty-six! Oh man, I qualify to be in my "late twenties"! OH MY GOODNESS! SAVE MY LIFE!
*calms self down*
Talking to Kok Hoong yesterday on the way out of school - he being my professional AC, was asking if I would take on employment as direct staff of Hwa Chong. I'm still considering and praying about it, actually - there is no concrete reason I can give voice to that tells me not to, and the pay is *slightly* better. But it means that I'll have to commit to this organization for another two years at least, and I really am unsure how the system will change in this time period. Already my hair stands when I sing the school song during assembly to Chinese High's logo on the Hwa Chong Institution flag. I'm sorry, it's not that I am disloyal, but I am teaching here for sentimental reasons, and because I lived the best days of my student life in this college. Yet, with the influx of the IP students next year, will this school still be the school I remember and love? without diversity, a natural population is rapidly decimated; same for a school population, don't you think? Let me continue to ruminate..
Back to the blurb. Somehow we got to talking about dreams and desires, and I could see he was taken aback when I said I might go to Bible school in 2007. Ha! It really is the common perception that only pastors go to Bible college, isn't it? Among other dreams, I also want to volunteer / work overseas for some time (perhaps a year?), really study photography or interior design or architecture or something to do with art, to have a job that necessitates my travel to all parts of the world to work my magic (haha, like what??) on the most beautiful sights of the planet. Maybe an antique restorer? Or a tour guide? HAH! My foot! All these will remain dreams, and little more than dreams, till I can shake free of my financial shackles. But I want to, and I choose to believe, that the freedom to do whatever I want and whatever God calls me to do WILL be mine one day. Remember Dennis Balcombe.
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